We hear a lot these days about entitlement, especially when we talk about millennials. I checked the dictionary for a definition and discovered, entitlement is "the right to guaranteed benefits under a government program." I put in my years of work and now I am entitled to Social Security... after all I did pay into the program over the years. Today word has taken on an additional meaning. I am entitled to something because of who I am. When it comes to millennials, some of them feel they are entitled to have the latest in mobile devises or to a college education. Some young athletes feel they are entitled to a position on the team because of who they are, or who their parents are. College graduates feel they are entitled to a top paying job right out of school.
I got to thinking recently, many older adults might have the same sense of entitlement. Once I reached the mid-fifties a new term was added to my vocabulary: Senior Discount. While it's nice to get a 10% discount when I shop at a certain grocery store, or to get a break on my greens fee when I golf, I have to wonder: why me? It seems to me that parents of young children should get a discount too. Raising children is expensive and many young parents are just getting started in their careers. They often have tight budgets. How about a young parent discount?
I don's see millennials as having a corner when it comes to a sense of entitlement. I also see it in older adults who have a lifestyle that focuses on themselves "I've paid my dues. Now I am entitled to time to relax, to play golf and maybe travel a little." There are even whole senior communities that appeal to this sense of entitlement. What probably troubles me most about this sense of senior entitlement is that they want to limit their relationships to other who are the same age or those who share their interest. Aside from their grandkids, they have no interest in associating with teens or young adults. That is a shame because if there was ever a generation that needs their insights and expertise, it's today's millennial generation.
Monday, May 27, 2013
Monday, May 20, 2013
"What Do You Have for Us?"
For the sake of anonymity I will call him Sam. He had a child at Lutheran High during the time I worked there but I had not seen him since I left six years ago. Sam and his family were not Lutheran, but attended a large Protestant church. They were involved and he was on the church vestry. After getting caught up on the family news, I asked if they still attended the same church. He paused, "We're kind of shopping around." I didn't have to ask because Sam offered an explanation and with it came an insight. The senior pastor has been there for almost twenty years and is nearing retirement. A few years ago they added a young associate to the staff. "He a dynamic preacher, but he doesn't seem to relate to the people my age."
"Who does he relate to?" I asked.
"Mostly young folks," he responded. "He kind of ignores those of us who have been around for years. It's like, 'What do you have for us?"
While I could identify with Sam's perspective I had to think, "So what's the problem?" In a time when teens and young adults are turning their backs on the church, we need more pastors who can relate to them. I could also understand Sam's perspective that the young pastor was not concerned about his needs. That might be especially difficult if Sam and his friends had supported the church with their time and money.
It does create a dilemma for a church, especially since Christians are usually not open to change. If there is one thing we can say about our culture at this time it is that there is change. Values have shifted and even faith perspectives have changed. For those of us over sixty, probably the best thing to do is focus on the eternal hope we have in Jesus. That never changes. I also would encourage them to try to relate to millennials. The church needs them, just like it needs us.
"Who does he relate to?" I asked.
"Mostly young folks," he responded. "He kind of ignores those of us who have been around for years. It's like, 'What do you have for us?"
While I could identify with Sam's perspective I had to think, "So what's the problem?" In a time when teens and young adults are turning their backs on the church, we need more pastors who can relate to them. I could also understand Sam's perspective that the young pastor was not concerned about his needs. That might be especially difficult if Sam and his friends had supported the church with their time and money.
It does create a dilemma for a church, especially since Christians are usually not open to change. If there is one thing we can say about our culture at this time it is that there is change. Values have shifted and even faith perspectives have changed. For those of us over sixty, probably the best thing to do is focus on the eternal hope we have in Jesus. That never changes. I also would encourage them to try to relate to millennials. The church needs them, just like it needs us.
Wednesday, May 8, 2013
Touching a Hot Button
It has been four weeks since the release of my new book Passing the Torch: Sharing Faith and Values with the Millennial Generation. I am a little overwhelmed by the initial response. While the book hasn't made any one's list of best sellers, I have gotten a lot of positive feedback. This book is my second attempt at self-publishing. My first book, Parenting Without Guilt: Avoiding the Seven Things Parents do to Screw-Up Their Kids, did alright in terms of sales but I never had that many invitations to talk about the book. This time is different and I am getting positive feedback and inquiries. I've concluded that while there are an abundance of books on parenting, there are not many authors who have tackled the topic of millennials.
What I am hearing is that people want to do something to reverse the trend: Teens and young adults are leaving the traditional church. This has been happening for over a decade but it seems like people are finally ready to take action. It's not enough just to be concerned, it takes a desire to understand and seek out millennials. It also means accepting those whose values and lifestyles might clash with what we believe. One criticism of the church is that it is not the place to ask questions or to discuss controversial issues. If you express an opinion that goes against the mainstream, you can expect get a "cold shoulder." That has to change.
The book attempts to help adults, especially those over forty, to begin to understand those under the age of thirty. It also includes strategies on how to begin to make a difference. The bottom line is we need to be people of hope in the midst of change. When we model our lives after Jesus, we can make a difference. Remember, Jesus always accepted and loved people for who they were. He calls us to do the same. You can check out the book at www.outskirtspress.com/passingthetorch. The book is available on Amazon.com in both standard and Kindle formats.
What I am hearing is that people want to do something to reverse the trend: Teens and young adults are leaving the traditional church. This has been happening for over a decade but it seems like people are finally ready to take action. It's not enough just to be concerned, it takes a desire to understand and seek out millennials. It also means accepting those whose values and lifestyles might clash with what we believe. One criticism of the church is that it is not the place to ask questions or to discuss controversial issues. If you express an opinion that goes against the mainstream, you can expect get a "cold shoulder." That has to change.
The book attempts to help adults, especially those over forty, to begin to understand those under the age of thirty. It also includes strategies on how to begin to make a difference. The bottom line is we need to be people of hope in the midst of change. When we model our lives after Jesus, we can make a difference. Remember, Jesus always accepted and loved people for who they were. He calls us to do the same. You can check out the book at www.outskirtspress.com/passingthetorch. The book is available on Amazon.com in both standard and Kindle formats.
Wednesday, May 1, 2013
Ok, So What is Appropriate Attire?
It was my wife who brought it to my attention, yesterday. "I think it might be something you might want to comment on," she remarked. It was a radio report on the informality at which millennials approach job interviews. It seems for some, flip-flops, shorts and tees have become OK attire when interviewing for a job. Some young adults even bring along a friend, or a parent. One young lady even showed up for a job interview accompanied by her cat. "What are they thinking," I was caused to wonder.
Then today I met a young man at the airport that caused me to reconsider. He was wearing a loud Hawaiian shirt, tattered shorts and sandals. He hammered away at his laptop while he also chatted on the phone. During a break in the action he asked me if I knew where the closest Starbucks was. When he returned I stuck up a conversation. It turns out he is partner, with a college friend, in a social media consulting business. They have around a dozen employees and work with other small companies. They help them use social media to spread their message. When I commented about the report mentioned previously, he just laughed. "Our employees work at home, so they might be naked for all I know," he commented. "I do have a three piece suit, because I know certain clients expect that image," he concluded.
I guess it's a matter of adapting to the situation. I am sure there is a big difference in the dress code at a law firm, as opposed to a social media giant like Facebook. Come to think of it, I can draw from experience. In retirement, we get around to the churches where our kids are involved in ministry. Most Sundays we attend The Crossing Church in Dallas where our son, Mark, is lead pastor. It tends to be a younger crowd and the atmosphere is informal. On those Sundays I can wear jeans and and open collar shirt. Our daughter is assistant director of music at Prince of Peace in Carrollton. If we are attending the 8:00 am traditional service I will usually wear a sportcoat and tie, but if it's one of the contemporary services I can get by with an open collar shirt and slacks. I dress in a similar fashion if we are going to Aledo, Texas to visit The Summit where our other son, Peter, is lead pastor.
Perhaps that is what we need to be sharing with the younger generation. It's OK to be yourself, but you also need to consider the expectations of others. What's appropriate? That's doesn't just include how we dress, but the kind of language we use and degree of etiquette. To be honest, I don't think God really cares about how we look. Rather like in the case of David (1 Samuel 16:7), he judges the heart.
Then today I met a young man at the airport that caused me to reconsider. He was wearing a loud Hawaiian shirt, tattered shorts and sandals. He hammered away at his laptop while he also chatted on the phone. During a break in the action he asked me if I knew where the closest Starbucks was. When he returned I stuck up a conversation. It turns out he is partner, with a college friend, in a social media consulting business. They have around a dozen employees and work with other small companies. They help them use social media to spread their message. When I commented about the report mentioned previously, he just laughed. "Our employees work at home, so they might be naked for all I know," he commented. "I do have a three piece suit, because I know certain clients expect that image," he concluded.
I guess it's a matter of adapting to the situation. I am sure there is a big difference in the dress code at a law firm, as opposed to a social media giant like Facebook. Come to think of it, I can draw from experience. In retirement, we get around to the churches where our kids are involved in ministry. Most Sundays we attend The Crossing Church in Dallas where our son, Mark, is lead pastor. It tends to be a younger crowd and the atmosphere is informal. On those Sundays I can wear jeans and and open collar shirt. Our daughter is assistant director of music at Prince of Peace in Carrollton. If we are attending the 8:00 am traditional service I will usually wear a sportcoat and tie, but if it's one of the contemporary services I can get by with an open collar shirt and slacks. I dress in a similar fashion if we are going to Aledo, Texas to visit The Summit where our other son, Peter, is lead pastor.
Perhaps that is what we need to be sharing with the younger generation. It's OK to be yourself, but you also need to consider the expectations of others. What's appropriate? That's doesn't just include how we dress, but the kind of language we use and degree of etiquette. To be honest, I don't think God really cares about how we look. Rather like in the case of David (1 Samuel 16:7), he judges the heart.
Friday, April 26, 2013
Reflections on Baseball and the Way we Share the Score
We came home last evening after spending four days with our three grandsons (ages 9, 7 & 5), while our son, Peter, and his wife attended a conference in Florida. The boys are in the middle of little league season and they pretty much live baseball. In the between games and practices, they play baseball in the backyard on a diamond they have set up. They also follow their favorite teams, and players. They have MLB-TV so they can pretty much watch any game. They also each have at least one fantasy team that they manage. The first one up each morning turns on the TV to the MLB Network to get the recap from the previous evening so they can update their brothers when they wake up. They take great pride in having the information first.
I couldn't help but think of how different it is to my childhood experience. Few games were on TV and we had to rely on the morning paper to update us on the scores from around the league. Late at night during the summer I would lie in bed and listen to the late games on the radio. My dad had rigged up an antenna on a pole outside that allowed me to pick-up stations from around the Midwest. I could listen to the Reds, Pirates, Cardinals, Cubs and White Sox. There were no west coast teams in those days, so everything pretty much was done by 11:00 PM.
I still am in awe when it comes to the way we get our information today. By the time I open the paper in the morning the scores from the previous evening are old news. On any particular evening I have a choice of multiple games to watch. It's not uncommon to be following my favorite team, The Detroit Tigers, on my i-phone, while watching the Texas Rangers on TV.
Many of the same things apply when it comes to how we access God's word. I still prefer my leather-bound Thompson's Chain Reference NIV Bible when it comes to devotions and Bible study, but I also have an app on my i-phone that allows me to read any chapter in the Bible from multiple translations and paraphrases. The same app has commentaries and a Bible dictionary. Amazing technology!
With all these changes, one thing remains constant. God's story remains the same and there is never a doubt when it comes to what the final outcome of the contest is going to be. The way God's story is told through our lives changes constantly though. When it comes to sharing that story with others, it is still best conveyed in a one-on-one personal way. Verbal communication is still the best way to pass the torch.
I couldn't help but think of how different it is to my childhood experience. Few games were on TV and we had to rely on the morning paper to update us on the scores from around the league. Late at night during the summer I would lie in bed and listen to the late games on the radio. My dad had rigged up an antenna on a pole outside that allowed me to pick-up stations from around the Midwest. I could listen to the Reds, Pirates, Cardinals, Cubs and White Sox. There were no west coast teams in those days, so everything pretty much was done by 11:00 PM.
I still am in awe when it comes to the way we get our information today. By the time I open the paper in the morning the scores from the previous evening are old news. On any particular evening I have a choice of multiple games to watch. It's not uncommon to be following my favorite team, The Detroit Tigers, on my i-phone, while watching the Texas Rangers on TV.
Many of the same things apply when it comes to how we access God's word. I still prefer my leather-bound Thompson's Chain Reference NIV Bible when it comes to devotions and Bible study, but I also have an app on my i-phone that allows me to read any chapter in the Bible from multiple translations and paraphrases. The same app has commentaries and a Bible dictionary. Amazing technology!
With all these changes, one thing remains constant. God's story remains the same and there is never a doubt when it comes to what the final outcome of the contest is going to be. The way God's story is told through our lives changes constantly though. When it comes to sharing that story with others, it is still best conveyed in a one-on-one personal way. Verbal communication is still the best way to pass the torch.
Monday, April 15, 2013
A Shift in Public Opinion on Marijuana: The Millennial Effect
I was born in 1946. That makes me a baby boomer. Boomers were born between 1946 and the mid-60's. Dad's came home from World War II ready to settle down and start families. The average married couple had four children. My generation impacted our society in a way no other generation had. To begin with, we comprised the largest population group in American history. We flooded the educational system: As an example. the community colleges were initially created to serve us. Now a new generation, that outnumbers even the baby boomers, is impacting our culture. In shear numbers the millennials, those born between 1984 and 2002, will dwarf my generation, and we are just beginning to feel their effect.
I was reminded of that again last week when I read a new report by the Barna Group. According to their research done earlier this year, for the first time a majority of Americans favor the legalization of marijuana. The margin is small, 51% in favor and 45% opposed, but the shift has begun. I can say that because of the significant 11% swing in public opinion in the last two years. You might ask: How can that be? More and more millennials are becoming part of the adult population and according to the Barna folks, 65% of millennials favor the legalization of pot. Warning: Before you start throwing stones you need to know that 50% of baby boomers also support the legalization of marijuana. Another indication is the fact that 24 states have already taken steps to decriminalize the drug.
I am not here to take a stand on the issue, although I do have an opinion. I can see the issue from both sides. As long as pot is illegal those desiring to use it will have to deal with the criminal element to get it. That means supporting the Mexican Drug Cartel and well, you get the picture. Marijuana is a gateway drug and the folks to peddle it will be glad to sell you something stronger. To legalize it takes away that risk, but I also know the marijuana is a drug. It promotes a lifestyle that I struggle to see as God-pleasing. It also comes with health risks. Let the debate go on.
I do know that we can never allow the court of public opinion influence who we are a God's people. It's up to each of us to dig into God's Word and determine how it applies to our walk of discipleship. To be honest, I don't believe God is going to condemn someone one to hell for smoking a joint, in the same way he is going to have mercy on those who commit other vices. So, what should we be doing:
Be open to the opinions of others. Learn to listen and to love them for who they are, I think that's what Jesus would want us to do.
Don't be so quick to judge. Remember, we are all sinners in God's eyes.
Our actions will always speak the loudest. Teens and young adults are watching to see how we run our lives. At all times we need to be an example of hope, unconditional love and discipleship.
I was reminded of that again last week when I read a new report by the Barna Group. According to their research done earlier this year, for the first time a majority of Americans favor the legalization of marijuana. The margin is small, 51% in favor and 45% opposed, but the shift has begun. I can say that because of the significant 11% swing in public opinion in the last two years. You might ask: How can that be? More and more millennials are becoming part of the adult population and according to the Barna folks, 65% of millennials favor the legalization of pot. Warning: Before you start throwing stones you need to know that 50% of baby boomers also support the legalization of marijuana. Another indication is the fact that 24 states have already taken steps to decriminalize the drug.
I am not here to take a stand on the issue, although I do have an opinion. I can see the issue from both sides. As long as pot is illegal those desiring to use it will have to deal with the criminal element to get it. That means supporting the Mexican Drug Cartel and well, you get the picture. Marijuana is a gateway drug and the folks to peddle it will be glad to sell you something stronger. To legalize it takes away that risk, but I also know the marijuana is a drug. It promotes a lifestyle that I struggle to see as God-pleasing. It also comes with health risks. Let the debate go on.
I do know that we can never allow the court of public opinion influence who we are a God's people. It's up to each of us to dig into God's Word and determine how it applies to our walk of discipleship. To be honest, I don't believe God is going to condemn someone one to hell for smoking a joint, in the same way he is going to have mercy on those who commit other vices. So, what should we be doing:
Be open to the opinions of others. Learn to listen and to love them for who they are, I think that's what Jesus would want us to do.
Don't be so quick to judge. Remember, we are all sinners in God's eyes.
Our actions will always speak the loudest. Teens and young adults are watching to see how we run our lives. At all times we need to be an example of hope, unconditional love and discipleship.
Tuesday, April 2, 2013
Americans Seek Wisdom, Not Salvation, in the Bible
Americans still value the Bible, just not in the same way they have in the past. That is one conclusion I reached when reviewing a recent study done by The Barna Group. According the research, 88% of American own a Bible, and 80% of us view the Bible as being sacred. 77% of Americans feel our country needs the Bible, with 32% reporting our nations problems could be solved if more people read the scriptures. The media and corporate greed are viewed as the other reasons our country is in moral decline.
Millennials, more than older adults, turn to the Bible for wisdom when it comes to life issues. Help with parenting was the top reason, with 42% of millennials listing in as a reason for turning to the Bible. Dealing with family conflicts was the next most popular reason with 40%. One third of millennials (33%) saw the Bible as a source of wisdom when it came to death or illness. For those over thirty: 22% sought insights on parenting, 24% on dealing with family conflict and 17% on death and illness issues. Among the conclusions: millennials seemed to be intrigued by the role of the Bible in providing guidance and wisdom. "It is a surprising expression of openness to Christianity amidst a generational cohort that is increasingly post-religious," notes the report.
While I have always found the scriptures helpful when dealing with life issues, I find it more as a source of hope and comfort. I would never think of using the Bible as a parenting manual or a guide on how to run a successful business. Only in the Bible can I find the incredible story of God's relationship with His people. More than that, only in the Gospels can I read of Jesus' suffering, death and Resurrection. Through the Epistles I am challenged in my walk of discipleship and service. In the Book of Revelation I find comfort in reading that the battle is won and I can gain a glimpse of the glory that awaits me in heaven.
Those of us who find our hope in the Good News of salvation found in Jesus Christ need to continue to share that message. The most effective way is not with words, but rather through our actions. The way we handle the issues of our everyday life should bear testimony to who we are as people of God. Our reactions in time of crisis, even when facing death, should attest to the hope we have in Jesus. We are always Easter people.
Millennials, more than older adults, turn to the Bible for wisdom when it comes to life issues. Help with parenting was the top reason, with 42% of millennials listing in as a reason for turning to the Bible. Dealing with family conflicts was the next most popular reason with 40%. One third of millennials (33%) saw the Bible as a source of wisdom when it came to death or illness. For those over thirty: 22% sought insights on parenting, 24% on dealing with family conflict and 17% on death and illness issues. Among the conclusions: millennials seemed to be intrigued by the role of the Bible in providing guidance and wisdom. "It is a surprising expression of openness to Christianity amidst a generational cohort that is increasingly post-religious," notes the report.
While I have always found the scriptures helpful when dealing with life issues, I find it more as a source of hope and comfort. I would never think of using the Bible as a parenting manual or a guide on how to run a successful business. Only in the Bible can I find the incredible story of God's relationship with His people. More than that, only in the Gospels can I read of Jesus' suffering, death and Resurrection. Through the Epistles I am challenged in my walk of discipleship and service. In the Book of Revelation I find comfort in reading that the battle is won and I can gain a glimpse of the glory that awaits me in heaven.
Those of us who find our hope in the Good News of salvation found in Jesus Christ need to continue to share that message. The most effective way is not with words, but rather through our actions. The way we handle the issues of our everyday life should bear testimony to who we are as people of God. Our reactions in time of crisis, even when facing death, should attest to the hope we have in Jesus. We are always Easter people.
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