The Right to Monitor

I drive the speed limit. Sixty means sixty. Thiry is thirty. You get the picture. It always amazes me the number of people I observed driving over the legal limit. Sunday morning is the exception. My wife and I drive to church on Interstate 635. Most people who drive that route on weekend know the police are out on Sundays, so they drive the speed limit. It's interesting to watch those who are speeding. They breeze past and pretty soon the brake lights come on. Why? They see a policeman beside the road with a radar gun. Sometimes they avoid a ticket, other times they get nabbed by the law.

There is a reason fewer people are driving over the speed limit on weekends. It's the threat of getting busted. For speeders: the presence of a police car is a great deterent.

I think there is a lesson here for the parent of teenagers. Cell phone and internet issues are a major complaint these days. We worry about what they are saying to each other. We are concerned about sexting and bullying.

Simple solution, tell them you will ask for their phone from time to time to check it. Like the police at the side of the road, the threat of presence will keep them in line. If they complain, remind them whose phone it is... hint if your name is on the bill it's your phone.

Even if you trust your kids, it's not a bad idea to check that phone every so often. The first couple of times you might even warn them. "Just a heads up, but I plan on checking your cell phone tomorrow." In doing so, you've given them the opportunity to eliminate anything personal, but you've also conveyed you are not afraid to do it. Let them know, "Next time I might not warn you," to keep them on their toes.

Let them know too, that you, like the police, are just concerned about their safety. It has nothing to do with trusting them. When you send them out the door each morning you are already doing that.