Academy 4

 

Yesterday I began my fifth year as a volunteer as part of the Academy 4 ministry through our church.  I was one of the one hundred plus volunteers who mentor 4^th grade students at a local public elementary school near our campus.

If you are not familiar with Academy 4, allow me to share the history.  The ministry grew out of St. Paul Lutheran Church in Fort Worth, Texas.  The congregation had a desire to partner with a local elementary school.  They desired to connect with students of families that were underserved.  They focused on fourth grade because educators have identified that age as being crucial in both the social and cognitive development of children.  The idea was simple, to provide every fourth-grade student with an adult mentor.  Today the program reaches over three dozen schools.

In the case of our church, our partnership with the school goes back over a decade.  We provide backpacks for students, collecting winter coats, support the faculty and staff with prayers and also assist with a mobile food pantry that visits the campus on a regular basis. 

For Academy 4, about half of the volunteers are church members, with the balance coming from our two partner schools, Prince of Peace Christian School and Creekview Senior High School in the Carrollton-Farmers Branch school district.  There also are mentors who come from the community, including officers from the Dallas Police Department. 

It is an amazing program, and it warms my heart to see the excitement in the eyes of the children when they run into the room each month to connect with their mentors.  The ninety minutes they spend one-on-one with their mentor includes time in a workbook developing life skills and then thirty minutes of hang-time playing a game together.

I am committed to Academy 4 for a number of reasons.  For starters, it is a ministry of compassion.  Secondly, it communicates to the students that there is an adult who cares about them.  Lastly, it is a cross-generational ministry, not only in the relationship between the adult mentor and the student, but in the fact that high school students are partnering with adults to make a difference.

I should point out that there is now a Leaders 5 program that allows students who have gone through Academy 4 to mentor a first-grade student.  There is also a parent program that relates the same skills to adults,

I would encourage you to check out Academy 4 and getting your local congregation involved in the program. 

Find out more at www.academy4.org

Still Living in the Tension

 

I began my professional ministry in 1969.  I was called to youth ministry at Trinity Lutheran Church in Cape Girardeau, Missouri, located just south of Perry County, where the Saxon Lutherans established their first church and seminary.  Lutheran tradition ran deep in Cape Girardeau.  It was a town of 35,000 with four active and growing Lutheran Church Missouri Synod congregations, plus a Lutheran campus center that served the students of Southeast Missouri State University.

Trinity was not only the largest Lutheran congregation in town, but one of the largest in the LCMS.  There were three traditional services held each Sunday.  All three were well attended.  The 11 am service was broadcast live over the local radio station. 

I immediately sensed a tension.  Winds of change were wrestling among the teens.  Part of it was having a youth center that was located just a block from a major state university.  The Jesus Movement was beginning.  That was happening amid anxiety over the Viet Nam war and racial conflict.  The reality that the town was highly segregated was obvious to the kids who made up my flock.

There was fresh spirit among the kids.  They were very much aware of the guitar driven music of the of the Jesus Movement.  I had been introduced to contemporary Christian music in my youth ministry classes in college.  Now it was avital part of my ministry. 

It did not go on noticed, and quickly led to a response, “It is okay in the youth room but don’t even think about bringing those guitars into the sanctuary.” 

It was not just worship style that caused tension.  My youthful flock was very aware of the cultural tensions.  We actively discussed the issues in the youth room.  We did Bible studies on how scripture applied to the issues of the day.  The core group of youth leaders had grown up in the church and attended the parish school.  Lutheran sacramental theology was in their blood, but so was a desire to speak to the needs of a changing world.

Reflecting, more professional church workers came out of those three years than in the rest of my ministry combined.

I share these memories now because in many ways the same anxiety still exists today. 

Our church body still is in tension.  How do we maintain our rich theological tradition and still meet the needs of contemporary culture?  How do we navigate change while staying true to our heritage? 

People often asked me about my feelings on the church, particularly the future of the LCMS.  I see the reality of a denomination that like other Protestant bodies has been in decline for decades.

My experience tells me that we are going to be okay.  I say that because I am confident God has me, in the palm of His hand.  God is faithful.  We need to personally stay faithful and focus first and foremost on our own relationship with Him. 

I say this reflecting on 55+ years of ministry.  I have seen many changes, including a split that deeply affected the church and impacted my own family.  I have seen leaders come and go.  Each decade seemed to have a new program that was going to impact and change things. 

Through it all I have been okay, because my God is faithful. 

We just need to tone down the voices and listen more to the Spirit of God.

 

He Made us Uncomfortable

 

The tension was high in the boarding area as I waited to board a flight back to Dallas.  The increased anxiety was brought about by an approaching storm.  The sky was darkening outside. People checked the weather app on their phones. It was obvious our flight was going to be delayed. 

Above the anxious murmurs came a boisterous plea, “Can anybody tell me the gate for the flight to LaGuardia.”  It was the distinctive “New York accent” that caught my attention.

The lack of a response caused an additional, “Can somebody help me.  I need to catch the flight to LaGuardia.  It’s an airport in New York.”

I looked up and immediately identified the source.  He was wearing a Yankee’s cap and T-shirt.  My life experience also told me he was likely a functioning autistic adult. 

There was a sense of uneasiness in the gate area. All seemed uncomfortable and threatened by the man. 

Suddenly a strong female voice, addressed him.  “I can help you, but you need to come over here.”  It was a Southwest Airlines gate agent.  She called to the man but was also headed in his direction.

Once at the podium, their conversation was not private.  He used the same animated tone.  I was close enough to hear her calm response. “Can I see your boarding pass.”  Once that was secured, she was able to reassure the man that he was at the right gate, but the flight did not leave for another two hours.  Other flights would leave from that gate before then.  She also explained the weather, “there might be a delay in your flight.”

She pointed to an open chair that was convenient to the podium.  “Wait there, and we will keep you informed.”

“Thank you!” the man proclaimed in the same unsettling tone.

I had observed but I also took time to reflect.

We are surrounded by people who are calling for help.  Often their cries make us uncomfortable.  Because of their demeanor, their skin color, their ethnicity or social status, we ignore, or turn away.  All of us in the gate area heard his cry, only one person responded.  She also had the information needed.

What the man required was someone to listen to him, to hear his problem and help him find his way.  Basically, he needed to be reassured he was okay.

During his earthly ministry, many times Jesus interrupted his journey because someone was calling out in a voice of panic and pain. He always stopped and rendered aid.  In some cases, the demeanor or physical state of the person made the disciples anxious. 

I believe he is calling us to do the same.  It might make us uncomfortable, but that should never keep us from being Jesus to others.  By showing care and compassion, we might nudge them closer to a personal relationship with The Savior.

 

Family Legacy

 

As I write this, I am concluding a brief trip to Michigan where I joined with others in celebrating the 50^th anniversary of my brother Jim’s ordination in the pastoral ministry.  It was great family gathering has my siblings and I had the opportunity to spend some time together.  It also served as a reminder of how blessed we are as a family.  We all have various aches and pains that accompany the senior years, but we are all still relatively healthy and mobile. 

The reunion caused me to reflect on our family’s ministry legacy.  In addition to my brother Jim and his pastoral ministry, my sister, Carol, is a retired Lutheran educator and my brother David, while not in full-time ministry, has always been an active layman, singing in the church choir and currently serving as an elder in his congregation.

It continues with the next generation.  All three of our children are in full-time ministry and so are my brother Jim’s, his son is a Lutheran school principal and daughter a director of family ministry.  My brother David’s son in also an ordained pastor, in addition to his full-time job. 

Recently our son Peter’s oldest boy started a DCE internship at a church, making us a three-generation DCE family.  While Peter is a pastor, prior to that he was a certified DCE. 

I share this not to be boasting, but rather to focus on our faith legacy.  I point to my parents, and before that my grandparents and aunt and uncle.  While none of them were trained ministry professionals, they were all involved in the life of the church.  Faith, church and family were the cornerstones of our existence.  Church attendance was not an option.  Family celebrations were an opportunity to celebrate faith milestones. 

I view three things as being vital if the faith legacy is to be passed on.

The foundation is personal faith.  It begins with daily devotions, prayer and personal Bible study.  It also requires that we be in community, in terms of worship and Bible study. We need people to hold us personally accountable.

Secondly, it requires intentionally passing on our faith heritage.  That requires both intentional teaching and modeling faith in action.

Lastly, we must live grace-fully.  Family life can be messy.  Siblings do not always see eye to eye on issues.  Feelings can get hurt, but we must always be quick to forgive.  Healing always begins with us and our relationship with Christ.  The fact that Jesus is Our Lord and Savior is the most important fact.  We always live under grace.

I become more aware of this as I age, joyfully waiting in expectation to join those who have gone before me in the heavenly choir.

 

 

 

 

 

The Daily Newspaper

 

We are one of the few families in our neighborhood that still has a daily newspaper delivered in the morning.  Five days a week I retrieve it from the driveway.  The other mornings it is delivered online.  I will be honest.  I do not like reading online versions.  I am old school and prefer to hold it in my hand while I sip my coffee.  Somehow, that feels more personal, and I feel a connection to the writer.  I do not mind shopping online or even reading the baseball scores that way, but my connection to the news must be more intimate.

My relationship to the daily paper goes back to my childhood.  In those days our family had two papers delivered daily.  The Detroit Free Press came in the morning and The Detroit News in the afternoon.  I will admit, The Free Press was my favorite.  I could always count on reading about the previous night’s games. It was a great way to start the day. 

For a time, I even delivered The Detroit Free Press.  That meant getting up at 5 am.  The papers would be on our front porch, bound with wire. The papers had to be hand-folded and placed in a cloth bag that would hang from the handlebars of my bike.  I delivered over a hundred and fifty papers each morning, completing my route before 7:00 am.   I had a real connection with my customers too, because I had to stop by once a week to collect my fee, so I could pay my bill.  All the money leftover was my profit for the week, usually around twenty dollars.

Much has changed.  We pay an annual subscription fee, so I have no connection with the carrier who delivers the paper.  Also, the paper has gotten smaller.  They have eliminated the baseball box scores because people read those online.  There are also few classified ads, people do not list things for sale in the newspaper anymore.  Now we have Zip Recruiter and similar websites so there is not need for a “help wanted” section.

There is more than just nostalgia that keeps me committed to my daily paper.  Reading the daily paper provides me with a personal connection to the news.  There is also more depth than when I just watch the news on tv.  In addition, I can pause and reflect. 

Probably the biggest reason for continuing to subscribe to the Dallas Morning News is that I can hear opposing perspective.  My daily paper does a good job of making sure multiple voices are heard.  While I do not always agree, it is important that I hear and understand viewpoints that are different from my own.  I will never understand or value others unless I hear their story.

I truly believe that is what Jesus calls us to do.  During his earthly ministry he connected with all kinds of people, representing lot of religious and social perspectives.  Nothing is accomplished if we only hear from those who share our perspective or opinions.

Daily newspapers are disappearing.  Unfortunately, many communities are left with no local paper at all. We need to support and encourage the local papers that remain.  We need them to not only keep us informed but to help us understand each other.

 

 

 

 

Discipling the Next Generation

 

Reflecting on my years in youth ministry, I must admit I was more often motivated by numbers than I was in discipling teens.  Cutting myself some slack, there were some members of my youth group with whom I had a close relationship.  I was very intentional when it came to equipping them to live out their faith.  Still, I was very aware that in the eyes of others, especially the pastor and church leadership, I was going to be evaluated on the level of participation.  I also must confess that self-pride was involved when I met with peers and we started comparing numbers. 

These thoughts came to mind as I read a recent article published by the Barna Group.  Barna identified five measurable characteristics of a holistic and active faith.

 

Spiritual practice - Praying and reading the Bible regularly

Evangelism – Sharing faith with others

Service – Volunteer and use talents to serve others

Belonging – Spend time with church friends

Calling – Feel called to integrate their faith with future career plans

 

As I considered the list, I was drawn to the reality that those are the same characteristic. we look for in disciples across the generations.  I need to be striving for the same goals in my ministry to older adults.

In the case of the Barna report, while over half of Christian teens participate in youth group, only one in four (18%) showed signs of a holistic and active faith.

The unfortunate reality is that we, as a church, usually do a poor job of discipling people of all ages.  Again, we still are drawn to evaluate our ministry in terms of numbers.  These days, if we can just keep the pews full and the budget balanced, we feel we are doing okay. As a result, often our goal is to just keep people happy and maintain status quo, rather than reaching the lost. 

We must be discipling people of all ages, but especially the next generation, it needs to be a community effort.  While we might add staff members to coordinate youth and children’s ministry, we must be ready to partner with them in the effort.  Discipleship is a community responsibility. 

 

 

The Catholic Archdiocese of Metro Detroit is facing a situation that is too familiar among church bodies.  They are looking at declining numbers, combined with increasing costs to maintain decaying urban cathedrals.  The situation was recently the focus in an article by sociologist Ryan Burge.

For clarification, that Archdiocese includes six counties in the Detroit Metro area.  Four of those counties are experiencing growth, while the other two, including Wayne County, which includes the city itself, are in decline.  When you look at the numbers, the church should be poised for growth, but that is not the case.

In 2011, 238,000 Catholics attended mass on a regular basis.  By 2024 that number had declined to 138.000.  The report also notes that since 2000 the number of infant baptisms has shrunk from 18,300 to 5,300 in 2024.  At the same time the number of funerals has declined from 9,700 to 6,000.  Did you catch that, at the current rate, the number of births is not keeping up with the number of deaths. 

From a business perspective, this is not sustainable.  Too much money is being spent to prop up aging urban cathedrals and not enough to invest in growth in the suburbs.  Additionally, there are fewer parishioners to support the ministry. 

My own church body, The Lutheran Church Missouri Synod, is facing a similar situation.  Today, the LCMS is half the size of what it was at its almost three million members in 1979.  Across the board, most urban congregations are struggling.  So are most rural and small-town churches.  The average congregation has less than a hundred people in worship on a typical Sunday.

In my opinion, too much attention, time and money is being spent to maintain what we have and not enough on growth.

In our case, the church’s leadership has shown through recent decisions, it is more interested in preserving tradition than it is on growth.  Notice I said traditions and not doctrine.  From my perspective, Lutheran theology is not the issue.  It is more an issue of practice, and how the Gospel message is presented. 

One reality is common among both the Catholics, the LCMS and other mainline denomination.  While maintaining our doctrine, we must become more focused on equipping the people we have to reach the lost around us. 

 

When someone recommends a book, I usually say thanks, but unless it is a topic that really excites me, I move on. When two or three people endorse a book it gets my attention. Such is the case with Joe Manchin’s new book, Dead Center: In Defense of Common Sense.

When someone recommends a book, I usually say thanks, but unless it is a topic that really excites me, I move on.  When two or three people endorse a book, it gets my attention.  Such is the case with Joe Manchin’s new book, Dead Center: In Defense of Common Sense.  To be honest, I have avoided most books written by politicians, but my friends insured me that this book was different. 

I admit that going in I knew very little about Senator Manchin.  I knew he was a democrat who had a reputation of being fiercely independent.  What impressed me early on in the book is how grounded and highly principled Joe Manchin is.  Raised in the Catholic tradition, he is also anchored in Christian principles.  I also valued the insights he provided on how we as a country can begin to heal from the current polarized environment.

At the close of the introduction, Joe Manchin shares his rules of the road that continue to guide his life.  One in particular caught my attention because I believe it holds the key to how our country might find its way again: “Listen with an open mind, embrace different perspectives and lead by bringing everyone to the table.”

During his time in Washington D.C., Joe Manchin made his home on a 65’ houseboat moored in a marina in the Potomac River.  He was known for hosting other members of congress from both parties.  Often over pizza and beer they would swap stories and share insights.  Joe Manchin wanted to hear all sides and never considered those from the other party to be the enemy.

Many years ago, on a visit to Williamsburg, Virginia I had the opportunity to have a meal at Christiana Campbell’s Tavern.  Early in the day, a tour guide had told us that it was George Washington favorite evening gathering spot.  Indeed, after all days debating foes in the Capital, Washington would hold court at night discussing the issues of the day informally with those who opposed him. 

It seems to me there is a powerful lesson here.  Our country just celebrated our 250^th Birthday, but to be honest my personal celebration was a bit subdued.  From my perspective, we are a divided nation.  We have established camps and find our greatest pleasure in hanging out with those who are like us.  The truth is we are a diverse country, but at the same time know very little about each other. 

We owe it to the next generation to learn from Joe Manchin and listen with an open mind, embrace different perspectives and making sure everyone has a place at the table.”  We need to find a way to be the United States again. 

 

 

Snoopy: A Hero for our Time

 

I was a freshman college student when I was invited to go on my first youth retreat as an adult leader.  The assistant pastor of my home church was the leader, and he based the program on the book The Gospel According to Peanuts by Robert Short.  It is not surprising that Peanuts is still a staple in the comic section of the newspaper.  Afterall, Dennis the Menace, B.C. and Family Circus are still around, but in my opinion Snoopy is different.  He is not the main character, yet he has become a cultural icon.  It is snoopy, not Charlie Brown, who appears every year in Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade.  What is even more astounding is that Snoopy has become somewhat of a cult hero among Gen Z’s.

Ypulse, a marketing firm that traces trends among teens and young adults, recently identified Snoopy as one of the nostalgic kids’ characters that Gen Z’s and Millennials identify with. They point to the fact that the single hashtag #Snoopy has 2.4B views on TikTok. Experts explain Snoopy’s popularity among the younger generation in part due to his youthful character and the nostalgic feeling that it conveys.

It is not just Peanuts and Snoopy.  YPulse also reports that 75% of 13-39-year-olds have bought merchandise based on or inspired by a kid’s TV show, movie, or book. 

What is it about Snoopy, in particular, that young adults identify with?  I believe Snoopy embodies many of the positive qualities such as imagination, resilience, and loyalty, that resonate with Gen Z's values. His playful nature and ability to find joy in simple pleasures align with the desire for authenticity and mindfulness among younger audiences.  

Perhaps there is another reason behind the appeal of Snoopy. Snoopy is creative and he has an imagination that allows him to take on a couple of different personas, Joe Cool, and the lawyer/businessman for example. However, I believe the character that most resonates with young people is the W.W. I flying ace who takes on the Red Barron.  In that role Snoopy takes on an enemy who is both fearless and threatening.  In many ways that is like the seemingly insurmountable challenges facing all of us today.

 

The Southern Border: Crisis or Ministry Opportunity?

 

We are only days removed from the primary election here in Texas.  Personally, I am grateful for the break before the general election in November.  I was weary from hearing all the commercial and having my mailbox full of campaign brochures. The “Crisis at the Border” was the most common theme.  I heard candidates warn about the country being threatened by drug dealers and human smugglers.  Candidates were promising to “close the border, and “finish the wall.” 

Do not get me wrong, there is a problem at our southern border, but I view it more as a humanitarian crisis than a security issue.  We do not need a border wall.  What we need is a better system to process those who want to come into our country.  We also must be able to identify those who are involved in criminal activity, so we keep them out. 

I recently had a conversation with a neighbor who owns a small business in southern Dallas. My neighbor, who is Hispanic, reported that most of his employees are immigrants from Honduras.  He states they are all hard workers, and great family people.  They also are all here legally. 

That reinforces what I see on news reports from the border.  Most of those pouring into our country are families who are looking for a better life.  They just want an opportunity to go through the legal immigration process, get a job and settle in.  Our country was built on welcoming individual like this, and while our unemployment rate is low, I still see signs in many businesses announcing the need workers.

A new report from Pew Research provided me some insight into how this is also a polarizing issue.  There really is a generational divide. While eight in ten (77%) Americans over the age of 65 and seven in ten (71%) of those 50-65 responded dealing with immigration should be a high priority, only three in ten (28%) of those ages 18-29 shared that opinion.  Only one half (49%) of those ages 30-49.  Quite basically, those over fifty want to stop the flow of immigrants, while those under fifty are asking, “what’s the big deal?”

I believe one of the main reasons Millennials and Gen Z’s see immigration as a lower priority is they have grown up in an environment where diversity is a reality.  Most have gone to school with people who share both a different cultural or religious background. Many have friends who come from different backgrounds as well.

I also believe the Bible provides us with some insight on how God desires us to respond to aliens and sojourners.  In Exodus 22:21, God states, “You shall not wrong a sojourner or oppress him, for you were sojourners in the land of Egypt.”  When separating the sheep from the goats in Matthew 25:35, Jesus states, “For I was a stranger and you welcomed me.”  The writer of Hebrews (Heb 13:1-2) encourages us to “Show hospitality to strangers, for thereby some have entertained angels unaware.

As Christians, I believe we have a duty to welcome those who desire to come in our community seeking safety and a place to settle.  It is our opportunity to be the hands of Jesus.  We need to be mindful of what Matthew said about Jesus; “When he saw the crowd, he had compassion on them because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd.” (Matthew 9:36)

 

 

For Such a Time as This

 

For many years I was posting weekly on Blogspot.  Unlike my weekly Passing the Torch Newsletter in which I try to unbiasedly report cultural trends and possible implications for the church, my blog provided an opportunity for me to comment and give my opinion on issues of the day.  Over the last couple of weeks God has put on my heart the need to resurrect my regular use of Blogspot.  I sense we are living in unsettling times.  This election year has the potential to be especially contentious.  Like many Americans, I am troubled by this.  While I am not fearful for the future of our country, God is still in charge, I am concerned about the long-term impact of this election year.  I am concerned over the kind of world my grandchildren will grow up in. 

I have always considered myself to be a conservative, but tend to vote more based on character than political party.  One of the disturbing things that I have observed over the last decade is louder rhetoric and a higher degree of contention. In the process, lines have been drawn in the sand and there is little room for compromise. Quite simply, we have lost our ability to listen to each other and to respect those who hold alternative opinions.  As a result, we have people on different sides of an issue standing on opposite sides of the street, holding signs, and shouting at each other.  The only ones standing in the middle are police officers who are there to keep the two sides apart.

One pet peeve of mine has always been that while we have classes on public speaking, we never offer instruction on public listening.  We teach students how to communicate their opinion on a topic, but never instruct them how to listen and discern what someone on the other side is saying.  More importantly, why they hold that opinion.   There can be no discussion and compromise unless we seek to understand each other.

I recently read David Brooks’ new book, How to Know a Person; The Art of Seeing Others Deeply and Being Deeply Seen.  The author addresses this issue in the chapter The Epidemic of Blindness.  He states,

“We live in an environment in which political animosities, technical dehumanization, and social breakdown undermine connection, strain friendships, erase intimacy and foster distrust.  We are living in the middle of some sort of vast emotional, relational and spiritual crisis.  It is as if people across society have lost the ability to see and understand one another, thus producing a culture that can be brutalizing and isolating.”

(How to Know a Person, page 97)

 

The unfortunate reality, from my perspective, is that Christians have become part of the problem, rather than contributing to the solution.  In the process, we have become known more for what we are against, than for what we should be stand for.  Our strong rhetoric on the issues, has drowned out the message of grace, love, and mercy we are called to represent.  This has deeply harmed our ability to reach younger generations.

My prayer is that we might turn down our voices and learn to listen to each other.  We need less emphasis on what we think and more on what others are thinking and feeling and why they hold such strong opinions.

“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called the sons of God.”

Matthew 5:9

Being More Like Daniel

It is probably a sad commentary on the state of things when I can say nothing really surprises me anymore.  The world I grew up in, it was pretty simple: there were girls and there were boys.   When it comes to sexual identities now, I hear all kinds of options, some lists contain more than fifty definitions of sexual identity.  Our present culture allows individuals to establish their sexual identity based on how that person feels.  The current environment can be particularly confusing and stressful for teens who as we know from experience struggle with their identity. 

Now a new proposal from the American Medical Association (AMA) seems to muddy the waters even further.  The recommendation is that going forward “sex should be removed as a legal designation on the public part of birth certificates.” A person's sex designation at birth would still be submitted to the U.S. Standard Certificate of Live Birth for medical, public health, and statistical use only.  The actual birth certificate a person carries with them for life will contain no reference to their sex at birth.  In the words of the AMA, “Requiring it can lead to discrimination and unnecessary burden on individuals whose current gender identity does not align with their designation at birth, namely when they register for school or sports, adopt, get married, or request personal records.”

We should not be surprised by the AMA’s statement.  The medical field has been moving in this direction for decades.  In 2007 there was one pediatric gender clinic in America.  Today there are hundreds.  Today’s teens, without parental permission, can walk into any of these clinics and find testosterone therapy available.  We also need to be mindful that gender dysphoria has long been recognized as a condition that can afflict children. While historically the focus has been on gender dysphoria among young males, contemporary girls can face the same issue. 

Being a “good Lutheran,” I find myself asking the question “What does this mean?”  In the context of my personal relationship with God, it changes nothing.  I am still a “man of God” who has been called to be a disciple of Jesus Christ.  I am still to be a person of grace, compassion and mercy.  The context into which I am called is vastly different than even ten years ago.  In many ways I am like Daniel, who was forced to live in pagan Babylon.  Daniel did not allow that toxic culture to change him.  He worshiped God and practiced his faith as he always had.  Yes, he paid a price for that, but in the end those around him saw his testimony and came to respect him and, in some cases, even worshiped his God.

Let us be people of grace, compassion and mercy, being slow to speak and quick to listen.  All the time, our actions and demeanor should reflect the Savior who gave his life for all people, even those who are searching for their sexual identity.

 

 

 

Who is Tommy Dorfman and Why we Need to Care About Her?

 I was drawn to an article in the most recent Time Magazine.  Okay, I will admit I drawn to the picture of what I thought was an alluring female.  After delving into the article, I was surprised to find out that it was Tommy Dorfman.   Tommy Dorfman is an actor who rose to fame playing a young man named Ryan Shaver on a Netflix show.  In her most recent roles Tommy Dorfman is being cast as a female.  You see, Tommy Dorfman has transitioned from a male to a female.  In the process, he/she has become a role model for LGTBQ youth in the United States.

While I find Tommy Dorfman’s transition troubling on multiple levels, I can reflect back on my own youth and my struggles with identity.  While I do not recall ever having questioned my identity as a male, I also realize I grew up in a different time when such ideas were not only tabu, but also not even on the cultural radar.  It is indeed a more challenging and difficult time to be a young person.  In many ways, the “you can be anything you want to be” dream has taken on a whole new meaning.

During my years in ministry, I had contact with countless teens and young adults who were struggling with their identity.  One of the great joys during my years as a school counselor was to watch students who were totally lost as middle schoolers, find their niche by the time they became seniors.  I found even greater pleasure when those students would return as successful alumni. 

I also counseled young people who were struggling with their identity as a person.  Yes, I did spend time discussing sexual identity with more than one student.  That was often a difficult conversation because as a faith-based school, the Gay/Lesbian issue was not supposed to be on the agenda. Of course, that was fourteen years ago and I suspect it is much different today. 

I know from Scripture that we are all, through the power of the Holy Spirit, being transformed into the people God wants us to be.  I know from personal experience, that God calls us to come along side those who are struggling with their identity.  This becomes a challenge for me today on multiple levels.  I know from experience that when I get involved with other people, it can get messy.  I might be drawn into situations or hear opinions that make me uncomfortable.  I also might encounter people who are heading down a path I see as running contrary to God’s desires for His people.

It is a challenge, but I sincerely believe it is one we must encounter. For too long the church, and church people, have become known more for “what we are against” than “what we are for.”  We have become quick to judge and slow to listen.  I truly believe we need to listen to people who like Tommy Dorfman are struggling with their sexual identity.  His behavior might be offensive to God, but then so is mine sometimes… and God loves me, just as He loves Tommy Dorfman just the same.

 

Frazzled Families

 You are in the middle of two years of your life you will not remember.”  There are certain comments that you not only remember, but where you can actually recall the exact location and circumstance.  In this case the words came from our good friend, Jean Heyse, as we stood in the driveway of the house, she shared with her husband Bob.  They were more than just friends.  Being a ministry family that was separated from the usually generational support system, we relied on church friends to come along side us and provide childcare, so we got a little break.  During our time in Dundee, Illinois Bob and Jean Heyse were our kids “surrogate grandparents.”

We were a somewhat unique family in that there is nine years difference between our oldest, Peter, and the next in line.  That meant at that point in time we had two children under the age of three and another who was on the verge of being a teenager.  Bob and Jean had stepped up to watch the youngest two while Barb and I enjoyed some time with Peter.  Now it was back to reality and Jean was offering both words of encouragement and truth.  Barb and I were both working full-time, she as a pre-school teacher and church musician and I as a DCE.  It was a “crazy time.” 

I thought of those hectic times in the last week as I read about the struggles that parents have been going through in the last year.  The pandemic has greatly impacted the members of the Millennial generation who are now parents.  They have had to pivot, from life as they knew it prior to COVID-19 to being sheltered at home.  No school or daycare for the kids.  The commute to the office has become the journey from kitchen to the dining room table where they try to get work done on their laptop, while also overseeing their kids.  They are balancing careers, while also overseeing their children’s education. 

New research from The Barna Group is even greater proof of not only how frazzled young parent are, but also their level of concern.  Nine out of ten parents report that they are concerned about their child’s academic and social growth.  In addition, anxiety and depression are at an all-time high among children and teens.  The same study also indicates that Christian parents have the same concern about the spiritual development of their children. 

I guess it is my “glass half-full” perspective that has caused me to see this as a rare opportunity for the church.  Those who minister to children and their parents have never had a more open opportunity.  Parents are hurting and they are begging for someone to listen to their cry and come along side them.  The challenge for the church is that the current circumstance calls for a different approach to ministry.  The big, flashy, “Sunday Morning Experience” approach no longer works.  This is a time when we need to take our ministry to them via social media and one-on-one contacts where they live. 

Millennial parents do not want “canned program” or lots of activities to entertain their kids.  They are crying for people who will listen to them, and them come along side them to help them navigate this difficult world.  The window of opportunity is quickly closing.  While we want to celebrate the re-opening of worship centers and enjoy fellowship with those we have missed, the real ministry is waiting for us in our neighborhoods. 

A Dose of Millennial Reality

 

After having gone through almost a year and a half of living under the threat of a pandemic, it is not surprising that my personal priorities and concerns are vastly different than they were two years ago.  I have commented to my family that I feel as if I have aged ten years since March of 2020.  As the death toll rose, I began to realize the possible impact and the issue of my own mortality became genuine.  In recent months both Barb and I have had to deal with health issues that brought that actuality into clearer focus.  Ensuring the financial future of our family, revisiting our will and even pre-planning our funerals have become higher priorities.  I have also become more focused on staying healthy, both physically and emotionally.  I have had to watch my diet much more than I did in the past.

I recently read an article that caused me to think about how different my priorities and concerns are different from those under the age of forty.  The information came from a recent study done by YPulse, a research company that tracks trends among Millennials and Gen Z’s.  It compared the top issues and concerns among those generations in 2020, verses 2019.  It is not surprising that COVID-19 replaced climate change/global warming as the top concern.  As expected, race/discrimination was listed second among their concerns.  What was shocking is what followed; Technology addiction, debt and personal finances and job security were the next highest concerns. 

While those of us over sixty-five are concerned about our health, and quality of life, those under forty are struggling with very practical issues.  As we consider our own mortality, they are wondering what their lives will be like in twenty to thirty years.  In the world where technology is advancing at an alarming rate, it is hard to comprehend what the future holds. 

This has drastic implications for a church that as struggled to stay relevant.  With most members over the age of sixty, it is not surprising that the conversation around the coffee pot on Sunday morning usually focuses on two things; our personal aches and pains and how the values have shifted to the point where the once forbidden has now become commonplace.  In the process, we expect the church to minister to us and our needs.  As a result, we can give little thought on how to reach and minister to those under forty.  We recognized that there is a void in congregational membership when it comes to young adults, but struggle to know how to overcome that.

It will only begin to change when we focus on seeking to understand the needs of those around us, especially those who belong to the younger generations.  We also need to remember that Millennials in particular are not looking for advice, as much as they are for individuals to come along side them and partner with them.  We must not only be messengers of hope but seek ways to help them address the issues facing them and their families. 

Be Strong and Courageous

 

Our son, Mark, gave me a copy of New Morning Mercies by Paul David Tripp for my birthday.  It contains 365 daily devotions, one for each day of the year.  Since my birthday falls on March 6, I began my one-year journey there.  I quickly discovered that the author seemed to be in tune not only with my spiritual needs but with the realities of being a disciple in a challenging world.

I found today’s message to be especially insightful.  He referenced the story of Joshua that begins in Joshua 1.  The leader of the Children of Israel faced a daunting task.  He was called to lead them across the Jordan River into the land promised them by God.  There were two distinct problems; 1) The land was already occupied. 2) The people were reluctant to move forward.  In the midst of that God’s command was clear and concise.  He must have wanted Joshua to get it straight because He repeated it three time; “Be strong and courageous.”

Like Joshua, we as disciples of Jesus are being called into a foreign and often antagonistic culture.  It is a world where the church is not only being viewed as “out of touch” but judgmental.  It is a much different world than the one we lived in even twenty years ago.  Still the command is clear.  As we go on our way we are to “make disciples,” sharing the good news of Jesus. 

The words from God to Joshua should be ringing in our ears, “have I not commanded you, only be strong and courageous.”  God promises not only to protect us but provide us with exactly what we need.   Our success does not depend on us or our words and actions.  We need to be persistent agents of grace and mercy.  This does not mean the task will be easy, but whatever the outcome, we live under the hope and promise of the Risen Savior. 

What Does Church Attendance Really Mean?

 

Weekly church attendance has long been one of the metrics we have used to measure the health of a local congregation.  If the number of people in the pews is consistent, or even showing grow, we have considered the church healthy.  In such cases the leadership is happy and the staff is commended.  Pastors and other church staff can easily fall into the “numbers trap,” feeling all is well. I also must admit it is not just a trap for the clergy.  I recall my days in parish ministry when one of the first questions asked by the Pastor on Monday morning was “how many kids showed up for youth group last night?”  I tended to gauge my success on numbers. 

In actuality, attendance has always been an inaccurate way to gage the health of a church.  Even consistent or growing numbers can be deceiving if people are there for the wrong reason.  I have often wondered; how many folks are in church to be spiritually fed and equipped for discipleship, versus how many are present simply for social reasons?  I have always felt that Bible class attendance is a better measuring stick when it comes to determining the spiritual health of a worship community. 

The truth is; none of this means diddly-squat in the post-pandemic world.  COVID-19 changed everything.  Suddenly churches were forced to pivot and switch to online worship.  As we emerge from the pandemic and people return, the new reality is hybrid worship.  Measuring online attendance is tricky.  Looking at the total number of views can be deceiving because you do not know how much people have actually watched.  Did they log on to check us out and quickly decided it was “not what they wanted” or did they just focus on the pastor’s message? 

There is an additional reality here: Church membership and even attendance does not mean what it once did.  Many of those under forty are simply not in the market to join a church.  It is more about having their personal needs and interests catered to.  They will jump from one church, and even denomination, to another simply because it is where their friends are at, or the pastor is a dynamic speaker. 

We need to ask ourselves the question: are we in the numbers game or are we interested in discipleship?  The paradigm has shifted away from filling the pews on Sunday morning to being in ministry where we are at.  The future of the church is dependent on our ability to reach people in the places where they live, work and play. 

My own pastor, Micah Miller, reminded the people at Prince of Peace Lutheran Church a few weeks back that Sunday morning is really practice for what happens in the real world.  People who worship on Sunday are the “core group of disciples.”  They must leave the building equipped and motivated to be the hands, feet and ears of Jesus.  I intentionally did not say “the voice” of Jesus.  In the past we have put a lot of emphasis on sharing the good news verbally.  In the current culture, we must earn the right to share our message.  We need to first have a relationship, and that happens when we serve and listen. 

In the future, we need to focus less on Sunday morning and more on being Jesus 24/7/365.  When we do share the Gospel message, we need to focus less on getting people to join our church and more on getting them to know and walk with Jesus. 

 

 

 

What to do About Pride Month

 June is Pride Month, and I am not sure what to do with that.  It is a thirty-day celebration marked by a variety of activities, including a Pride Parade.  It seems that there are rainbows everywhere.  Most major league baseball teams are participating by having a Gay Pride Day.  The major television networks are not only recognizing Gay Pride but doing feature stories on how far we have come as a society when it comes to recognizing our difference.

The "Gay Pride" movement traces its roots back to 1969.  Thom Higgins, a gay rights activist from Minnesota, and Brenda Howard, known as the “Mother of Pride” coordinated the first Pride march in New York City.  It has continued to grow and now is celebrated world-wide.  Contemporary culture has only fortified the movement as Millennials and Gen Z’s work to promote principles of tolerance and acceptance.  Even major Christian denominations have stepped on board, with rainbow flags and signs appearing on church property.  Even so, it is a struggle for me.  It is difficult for me to recognize, much less celebrate, a lifestyle I view as totally against God’s plan for us. 

I was challenged in my perspective on the LGBT movement many years ago.  The house next store to us went through a foreclosure and months of being vacant, falling into disrepair.  We rejoiced when a young woman bought the house.  Her parents soon showed up to help her do repairs and redecorate.  Then, shortly after she moved in, her female partner moved in as well.  Still, I extended the hand of friendship.  I got to know them.  I discovered that they both had great jobs at a major accounting firm.  They asked what I did, and I sensed a level of discomfort when I told them I was in full-time youth ministry.  My faith was now out in the open.

I still did my best to be a good neighbor.  When a lightning strike caused major damage and disrupted our routine, we joined forces and shared a generator to keep things running.  I recall helping them jump-start their car.  I tried to be friendly, always extended a greeting when we crossed path.  Still, it was a little uncomfortable.  I recall Mark and Katie, who were in grade school at the time, inquiring why when they had a pool party, all their friends were women. 

The day finally came when I saw them carrying out boxes.  Soon a van showed up and it was obvious they were moving out.  I inquired and found out they had bought another house in up-town Dallas, closer to where they worked.  In the process, I received an unexpected surprise.  The homeowner thanked me for a being a great neighbor.  She went on to say she recognized our differences but that was never a barrier.

My hope is that somehow, our brief friendship left a positive impression that as a Christian, I accepted her for who she was.  Taking it a step further, we need to remember that we are called to be Jesus, who always accepted people where they were at.  Without a relationship, He could never move them to where He wanted them to be.  Paraphrasing John 3:17, “We are not called to judge or condemn others but rather to love them and be Jesus in their lives.” 

So, while I will not celebrate Pride Month, I will view it as a reminder that Jesus came to save the lost.  He loves us, with all of our flaws and calls us into a relationship.  Only in that relationship can we discover his grace, love and the eternal plan He has for each of us.

 

 

 

On Being a Patriarch

 

We just returned from a quick weekend trip to Detroit.  It was the first time I had been on an airplane in over a year.  The plane was full and the airport seemed busy, but felt very safe.  There was a dual purpose for the trip.  Our Uncle Don died from COVID over a year ago and it was not until Saturday that we were able to celebrate his life with his church family.  On Sunday we celebrated our mom’s 100^th birthday.  Mom had not been out of the nursing home in over a year.  It took about an hour but once she got warmed up, she was sharing stories and had us laughing.  Mom can barely see and has always been hard of hearing, but there is no doubt her mind is sharp.

It was quite a gathering with over thirty of us traveling from Baltimore, Columbus, Ohio and Dallas to join the family that live in Michigan.  In the midst of the celebration, I became aware of a reality; I am the patriarch of the family.  Uncle Don was 97 years-old and never married.  He was always like a second dad.  When our dad died in 2004 it just seemed natural to consider my Uncle as the male head of the family.  Even though he has been dead for a year, this weekend just felt different. 

Then I got to pondering on what being the patriarch of a family actually means.  In my mind, the primary thing a patriarch is to do is make sure the family legacy is maintained.  That requires not just modeling and leading by example but encouraging those who follow to walk as disciples as well.   As I reflected on that thought, it occurred to me that that is what I have always tried to do. 

I truly believe that is what all of us are called to do as members of the Body of Christ.  Passing on the legacy of faith is vital.  I sincerely believe the reason the church has struggled over the last few decades is because adults, especially Baby Boomers, have focused on themselves and neglected passing on the heritage of faith.  We’ve done a good job of kingdom building and failed at building God’s Kingdom.  Personal wealth and success have become a higher priority than passing on the Gospel message of grace and hope.

Now I want to do my best to stay healthy so that my tenure as patriarch is long and productive. 

 

Youth Ministry in a Post-COVID World

 

I spent much of my professional career in youth ministry.  Over the last year I was very grateful to be retired.  I honestly could not imagine what youth ministry would be like in the midst of a pandemic.  Having spent time with some of my youth ministry friends last week convinced me that even post COVID-19 the way the church minister to teenagers and their families is going to look very different.  The days of pizza and Bible study in the youth room might be in the past.  According to my director of Christian education (DCE) friends, just because churches and youth rooms are again open does not mean the kids are coming back. 

One of the unfortunate results of the pandemic for teens is that anxiety and depression have become a major issue.  Traditionally, teens are social creatures and the period of isolation has taken its toll.  In many cases they have lost their support system, and at a time when the church youth ministry staff could provide encouragement face-to-face contact is not possible.  During this time the Center for Disease Control and Prevention found symptoms of anxiety and depression up sharply from the previous year.  Almost 11 percent of all respondents to that survey said they had "seriously considered" suicide in the past 30 days. For those ages 18 to 24, the number was 1 in 4, more than twice as high.

Three things that church leaders, especially those working with teens, need to keep in mind moving forward;

Relationships matter.  One-on-one relationships with teens is vital during this time.  After spending hours online going to class, the idea of spending time on Zoom with the group from church is not as enticing as it was early in the pandemic.  What they really need is the intimacy of a relationship where they can talk about the issues that are troubling them.  The best approach for the church youth ministry teams might be to “divide and conquer.”  Divide the list of teens among the various members of the team, with the youth ministry professional taking those who might need the most attention.  Texts and phone are a good way to connect. 

Encourage spiritual disciplines.  Daily devotional thoughts sent via group text are a great way to start.  Sending them out early each morning might encourage them to begin their days in God’s Word.  When you do gather as a group, provide some models of how to find peace and solitude.  Prayer walks or similar activities help provide structure.  Through it all, we must be messengers of hope, modeling what we preach.

Parents are vital.  The new model for ministry puts less emphasis on what happens at church through children’s and youth ministry and more emphasis on the home.  Some churches were already moving toward this paradigm but the pandemic has greatly accelerated the process.  Millennial parents, more than past generations, want to be responsible for the spiritual formation of their children.  We need to be mindful that this really is the biblical model, and that the church community is really only there to provide encourage and support.

 

Some other things that church leaders need to keep in mind going forward.  The church youth room, like some of the rest of our facilities, might be devalued.  Just because the youth facilities are less used does not mean ministry is not happening.  Secondly, stop playing the numbers game.  In the post-pandemic world relationships are vital.  Some of the best ministry is going to be happening one-on-one way from the church building.