Putting Aside Our Agenda Might Become Hairy

If you live in the DFW area you are probably familar with the story of Taylor Pugh. Taylor has been in the news lately because according to the Mesquite School District his hair is too long. Taylor was not allowed to attend class with his friends, but instead received one-one instruction in private. What made this story so disturbing to me was Taylor's age. He's four years old.

I caught on early to the fact that this was his parent's agenda. Mom was the spokesperson. In fact we never really heard from Taylor himself. Length of hair was the agenda and mom would not budge. When the school district offered a compromise, hair ok as long as it was braided, she stated that doing so caused his head to hurt.

Jacquielynn Floyd offer a different perspective to the Taylor Pugh saga in this morning's Dallas Morning News. She tracked down a former hair martyr named Heath Peables. Heath was a Texas sixth grader in the 70's when his parents took a similar stand. "I just wanted to be normal. I wanted to fit it." he stated in a recent interview.

Therein lies the reality for most pre-school and elementary age kids. They just want to fit it, to find their place in the classroom. The sad case is that too many times a parent's agenda becomes the child's and in the process the child is the victim.

Somewhere along the line we need to convey our thoughts and opinions to our children but in almost all cases they need to be allowed to develop thier own agendas. That probably won't happen until the teen years. Up until then their primary agenda is just being a kid and fitting in.

By the way, Taylor is back with his friends, his hair in cornrow braids.

Reflections on MLK Day

I grew up on the eastside of Detroit in the fifties and sixties. Motown was a very segregated city in those days. I lived an all-white neighborhood and went to a public school where I was surrounded by kids like me. There were "colored people," that's what they were called in those days, living in Detroit but they had their area of town and we had ours.

Something significant happened in my life in 1962. The Board of Education bought all the houses in our neighborhood in order to expand elementary school and convert it into a high school. It was a known fact that the new high school would be one of the first to be fully integrated. Most of our neighbor chose to flee to new homes in the suburbs. My parents made the decision to move further into the city. Over the next several years the neighborhood where our family lived went through several transitions. The riot of 1967 marked the beginning of change. Blacks had made their statement and the city was never the same. My parents lived in that same house until 2004 when they moved to an apartment in a retirement community. Dad died within six months.

My dad never talked much about Dr. King, but I believe they shared a common believe. We all need to learn how to just get along together. People, regardless of color, need to live in peace. I think the reason my folks were able to live in the same home in the city for over forty years was because my dad always viewed his neighbors as his friends. He greeted all people with a friendly hello. As a result those who lived around him tried to watch out for him and mom. Their snow was shovel and their house protected.

So, while the rest of the world reflects on Dr. King, I will reflect on my dad and the heritage he passed on to me. All people are part of God's creation. All people need to be loved. All people need Jesus. "Why can't we all just get along?"

What kind of heritage are you passing on to your children? What do your actions say about your attitude toward those who are different than you?

The Gift of Texting

I was a substitute teacher in a middle school yesterday. At the end of the day one of my assigned tasks was to return cell phone to students. In that school student are required to hand over their phones at the beginning of the school day so that they are not tempted to be using them during the school day. Almost all schools have a similar cell phone policy. While it was a minor inconvenience, it caused me to consider what a gift modern technology is.

When I was in high school I always carried a pocket full of dimes. That is what it took to use a pay phone to call home. I got in trouble with my parents during my junior year and after that I was required to check in any time my plans changed or I was going to be delayed getting home. I could have never imagined when there would come a day when I would carry a phone in my pocket.

I am relatively new to the world of texting. I got a new cell phone in November and added two features to my plan. I now have a blue tooth so I can talk hands-free while driving and I have unlimited texting. I soon discovered that most of my texting is to our kids. We have three adult children. Texting is a great way to check in with them without disrupting their routine.

What a gift texting is to parents! It's a way to stay in touch with our kids when they are out of sight. I know not all parents are as "techno-savy" but in my opinion it's worth paying for unlimited texting and to put forth the effort to learn how. Oh by the way, please avoid the temptation to text your child during the school day, lest you get them in trouble.

And the #1 message we should be sending. "Luv Ya! GB" (that's God Bless).