We Need to be the Reason Millenials Stay with the Church

I am wondering if millennials are getting a bum rap when it comes to their association with mainline churches.  A recent article published by the Barna Group revealed that it isn't just young adults who are avoiding God's house on Sunday mornings.  Nation-wide, 47% of American adults reported that they had not attended church in the last six month.  That compares with 52% of millennials who gave the same response: that's only a 5% difference.  In light of that, I can conclude that it is not just those who are under the age of 30 who are turning their back on the church.

The folks at Barna also provided some insights into why some young folks are staying connected to the church.  When it came to why they attend church, the number one reason was they had close friends (59%), followed "gaining an understanding of my purpose for a life in Christ."  In other words the reason millennials stay committed to a worship community is relationships and personal relevance.

When I read the Barna report, I immediately thought of a conversation that I had with a father sometime back.  It was one of those casual chats that I occasionally have in Starbucks.  In this case I was working on my laptop, but I had my Bible open next to it.  I have found that an open Bible is can be a great prompt.  This dad asked what I was reading, we began a chat.  He was concerned about his daughter and appreciated my passion for reaching out to millennials.  His daughter had graduated from a college and moved to a major city in the Midwest,  She was a creative illustrator and dad was proud of her work (he showed me samples on his phone).  His daughter had been into the Goth culture in high school and had several body piercings.  During college time she added a couple of tattoos.  Dad did not always approve, but in his words, "You love them for who they are."  The daughter had grown up in the church and according to dad was even active in a Christian organization in college, but now she was not attending church.  She can't find a church where she is comfortable.  There was a pregnant pause in our conversation.  "Can I be honest?" dad asked.  I nodded.  My daughter values traditional worship, but when she shows up the members ignore her. 

His story is all to familiar.  Lets face it.  Most of us "over fifty Christians" enjoy our worship communities.  We look forward to the Sunday morning experience.  Part of that experience is the fellowship time.  I am probably like you in that I enjoy checking in with friends that I typically only see on Sunday mornings.  Don't confuse the issue by asking me to have a conversation with someone who is different.  But that is what Jesus called us to do.  Jesus welcomed all people, and he always accepted them for who they were, not who he wanted them to be.  When we welcome millenials into our worship community we are opening the door to a possible relationships.  When that happens, we need to be ready to take on the tough issues of the day with an open mind, and then an open Bible. 

We might have the opinion that young people only want to relate to people their age.  The reality is they see value in experience and desire relationships with folks of all ages.  The vital things is that people be open to sharing their insights.  An integral part of that sharing is our relationship with Jesus Christ. and insights into our personal walk of discipleship. 

Grandparents Behaving Badly

I normally try to avoid personal pet peeves on my blogs, but an incident last Friday compels me to change my policy, at least for the moment.  The pet peeve is people who don't use crosswalks.  In this case it was a woman with three small children, including a baby in her arms.  I can still see the fear in the eyes of the little boy, probably four or five years old.  There he was on an island, as a few inches away cars whizzed past at 45 mph.   Rather than walk the twenty steps to the intersection, the woman chose to cross the street in front of a McDonald's.  This was no young mom, but rather a grandmother... someone who should have known better.  Evidently grandma had not read the article in the paper two days prior.  Another grandmother, along with her two grandchildren, had been seriously injured.  They too had tried to cross the street against traffic.

They are called crosswalks for a reason.  They are provided so that there is a safe place for people to cross busy streets.  Most municipalities have even provided signals that tells us when it is safe and when it is not.  Many now even have a system that indicates the time left until the light turns green and it is no longer safe.  In fact, it's against the law to ignore the signs and cross a street against the light.  It's called jaywalking, and unfortunately it is seldom enforced.  I shudder when I see children involved in at risk behavior.   It's particularly troubling when it is an adult who has made the decision that puts them in the line of fire.

As parents and grandparents we have a responsibility to make sure our children are safe and secure.  I also believe we have an obligation to avoid behaviors that set a poor example.  I view the excessive use of alcohol or the use of tobacco products as behavior that should be avoided when children are present.  Cabinets containing dangerous items should be locked and sharp objects out of sight.  In the same way, we should model positive and God-pleasing behavior in our language, including the things we say about other people.  We also need to be driving within the speed limit and... using crosswalks.

Parenting and grandparenting not only carries with them the responsibility to pass on the heritage of faith and values, but to model behavior that promote safety, good health  and proper citizenship,

Reflecting on 9/11

Like most American, I can tell you exactly what I was doing and feeling on September 11, 2001.  My personal world had been rocked the previous afternoon when we had received the word that my wife, Barb, had been diagnosed with breast cancer.  Still, life had to go on.  The next morning I was back in the office serving as school counselor at Lutheran High School of Dallas.  The first item on my agenda was to meet with three students who had skipped school the previous day.  They had driven to Arkansas to pick up a friend who had had second thoughts after running away from home.  I had checked out their story, and while I appreciated their dedication to their friend, I was trying to help them work through the decision making process: two of them were on academic probation and could not afford to have missed a day of class.  Our conversation was suddenly interrupted by the principal, Pat Klekamp.  "I need you now," she exclaimed.  I knew immediately that something was seriously wrong.  Pat always respected my privacy when dealing with students.  She also always knocked before entering my space. 

I followed Pat to her office, asking the school secretary to tend to the students I had left behind.  Pat clued me in on the news.  The students were becoming aware, as more of the teachers turned on the televisions in their rooms.  "We need to do something to reassure them," Pat noted.  We immediately decided to use the customary religion period after second hour as a time for sharing words of assurance and for prayer.  I was given the task of pulling something together.

Less than an hour later I stood in front of the assembled student body.  The mood was somber, I still recall how the kids silently entered the room.  By this time both towers had fallen and it was obvious the death toll would be high.  There was no doubt that our nation was under attack.  There were rumors that the next city to be attacked was Dallas.  It had become personal to at least two students who had relatives who were in New York City, one of whom was scheduled to be in one of the towers. The first scripture that I shared with the students and faculty was Psalm 121:1, "I looked to the hills.  Where does my help come from?  My help comes from the Lord."  

I continue to share that same verse with patients as I make my rounds as a hospital chaplain.  Though our earth might be rocked... our souls are secure.  The same Lord who watched over the Children of Israel watches over us.  The Savior who strengthened the disciples and the other New Testament believers, gives us the power to stand against Satan's attacks today.  We are going to be OK. We should  never forget the events of 9/11 and the victims of that attack.  We also should never forget our Savior, Jesus, who insures that their future and ours is secure.

Keeping the Door Open for Seekers

An article on www.CNN.com this week started me thinking about the way we reach out to seekers; those who don't openly confess Jesus as Savior but are willing to listening to the message.  Seekers tend to connect with the church through questioning.  They often don't connect with God through traditional faith patterns.  When they pray, it's more with hope than it is confidence. The article that perked my interest was titled Six Types of Atheist and the author was Dan Merica.  While I never considered seekers to be atheist, one of the groups was seeking agnostics.   In the opinion of the author, seeking Agnostics are unsure about God but open minded.  In many cases they have been brought up by Christian parents and often they have even confessed that faith publicly. 

The seeds of doubt and skepticism that grow into atheism are sown and take root during the teen years.  It could be their exposure to the theory of evolution.  It might be because they see the church as being hypocritical.  They might see the church as irrelevant to their world.  The unfortunate reality is they perceive the church as not being a place where you can discuss these issues.  If you express any doubt or skepticism you are labeled.  When the tough questions are asked, instead of answers the response is usually you need to have more faith.

Unfortunately the climate within many faith communities does not encourage engagement with those who are young and seeking.  We often look with disdain on those who young.  They dress and look differently.  Tattoos? Body piercings?  Purple hair?  That's not our style.  We not only don't feel comfortable but we don't like it.  In such cases our personal bias can become the barrier that does not allow us to engage them in conversation, much less to talk about the issues. 

As a church we need to welcome the seeking agnostics.  We also need to give them a forum where there the questions can be asked and the issues discussed.  As long as they are part of our community we have the opportunity to pass on the heritage of faith.  Questions, doubt and even rebellion are part of faith development process.  When we do not allow a forum where the issues can be discussed, we run the risk of losing them.