Kids Who Walk on the Wild Side

Reflecting back on our high school years, we probably all knew kids who tended to walk on the wild side. Within my circle of friends it was Bobby. His dad worked for an auto dealership, so the family alway had access to new cars. They were almost always the slickest and fastest. He drove those cars with reckless abandon. Bobby loved speed. His parents bought him a motorcycle. I recall the day he stopped by to show it off. Fortunately when he offered me a ride my mom was standing close by. "No," she said firmly. My parent were on to Bobby. They made it clear. I was not to get into a car when he was behind the wheel, and they definitely didn't want me riding a motorcycle with him.

I thought of Bobby last weekend. There was another tragic story on the news; another accident where a teen was killed while a passenger in a car. In this case the seventeen year old driver was driving at a high rate of speed. To me the most revealing comment came from a classmate. "Some kids just are not mature enough to have a license," he noted.

None of us want to be accused of sitting on the judgement seat when it comes to our teen's friends. Yet we can sense when one of their peers might be capable of putting themselves and others at risk. It behooves us to have a conversation with our teen. Ask for their impression of their peers. Which ones tend to make poor choices> Which ones tend to take risks that even scare their peers? We can't force our kids to not associate with those teens who tend to live dangerously. The fact is, those kids need friends who are a positive influence. But when it comes to putting their lives in the hands of those teens, they better consider the possible consequences.

Somewhere today there is a parent who wishes that they had had that conversation.

Drivers License: Just Another Right of Passage

Few events stir-up more fear and anticipation than having your teen get their first drivers license. I was reminded of this while at DFW Airport this morning. I spend one morning a week serving as a DFW Airport Ambassador. Sitting at an information booth puts me in constant contact with the traveling public. In this case it was a dad traveling with his two teenager daughters. He inquired on how to get to the Rental Car Center. While I explained, the two girls discussed what kind of car they were going to be touring Dallas in. Referring to the oldest daughter he remarked, "She just finished drivers education and is anxious to get her license. I am not sure I am ready for that." "Been there - Done that," I thought.

Getting a license and being behind the wheel for alone for the first time is a big deal for a teenager. For parent there are a lot of mixed feelings. No more chauffeuring - balanced against the increased cost for insurance. As our teens gain more freedom, our anxiety usually rises. Barb and I negotiated our way through that period with a few scary moments and some funny stories to tell. In the end we survived. In the process helped our kids achieve the freedom they cherished and we desired.

AAA offers some recommendations to make the transition easier and safer. Ironically, many of the tips focus on parents. It begins with being a positive and responsible role model. If you are a safe and law-abiding driver, your kids probably will be too. Secondly,know and understand your teen. The reality is some kids are responsible enough to drive before they turn sixteen, others still can't handle the responsibility at age twenty-one. Another tip: Designate your car a "cell-free zone." Make it a family rule that the driver has their phone turned off. Identify one passenger as the "designated texter." That individual can monitor the GPS and stay alert for any messages.

Getting your drivers license, like graduating from high school and heading off to college, is just another right of passage.

Occupy Dallas: Is There a Better Way?

I heard on the news this morning that hundreds of people camp out overnight outside of area Apple Stores waiting to be the first to purchase a new version of the i-phone. I am sure somewhere Steve Jobs is smiling. My question is: What is it that compels us to want the biggest, best and newest of everything.

The other news story that caught my attention today was word that the Occupy Dallas protesters have reached an agreement with the city on relocating their tent city. As I understand it, the Occupy Dallas folks were inspired by the group currently protesting on Wall Street. Their angst is directed at corporate America and the greed that seems to drive it. They are calling for people to again take control of our country.

I see a connection between these two stories. In my mind there is no difference between corporate greed and personal greed. We have reached the point where greed, rather than survival drives our economy. As a nation we have gotten the difference wants and needs confused. If they want to send a message I would suggest that they move their tent city to North Park Mall, or Southlake Town Center.

I visited the auto show at the State Fair of Texas last week. I enjoy looking at the new cars, and yes I would like one of them. Reality is, what I need is transportation and my ten year old Saturn with 195,000 miles provides that. I see that as doing my part.

As parents and adults we need to be setting a better example for our kids. If some of us learned to live with a little less, maybe those that don't have enough right now would be better off.

What the Decline in the Daily Newspaper Says About Us

I have always been a dedicated newspaper reader. That is probably rooted in the fact that as a high school student I delivered almost 200 copies of the Detroit Free Press each morning. Being up at 5:00 AM and delivering those papers rain or shine probably breeds either a sense of commitment or insanity. Truth is, I still anticipate opening the Dallas Morning News each day. I have my first cup of coffee as I peruse the sports section. After reading the sports section I move on the metro and front sections. I try to devour it all. Even though, thanks to television and the Internet, I might know the results from games the previous evening, there is always a new insight. Seeing it in print sort of makes it official.

I am aware that our world is changing and that printed newspapers might soon be a thing of the past. Yes, I can find the same material on a website. In fact, I can expect instant updates from the newspaper on my computer during the day should a major story break. The Internet is a great resource.

The fact that our dependence on print media is declining was underscored by the results of a recent survey conducted by the Pew Research Center. When people were asked to name the source they relied on most to gain information on their community, the results were vastly different for those over the age of forty, as opposed to those in the 18-39 group. When it came to the local newspaper, only 15% of those under forty named it as their favorite source, as opposed to 32% of older adults. The percentage naming television as their favorite source was almost equal, 12% vs.14%. The favorite source of information for those between the ages of 18-39 was the Internet, with 22%, compared to 13% of older Americans who relied on their computers for information.

While this study did not include teenagers, I suspect we would see a similar trend. During my years on the faculty at Lutheran High School of Dallas, copies of both the local newspaper and USA Today were made available in the school library. Most of the time they would go untouched. If I referred to a newspaper article in a classroom setting, I usually got a puzzled look from my students.

Probably the most disturbing aspect of the Pew Research Study was the fact that 30% of those between the ages of 18-39 did not name a source for their information. Experience tells me that teens mirror that. Most are clueless when it comes to national and world news, unless it invades their personal world. In my mind, a daily newspaper should be required reading for all young people. Whether they view it at the breakfast table or on their i-phones doesn't matter. The fact that we are so focused on ourselves does bother me.