A Culture of Harassment

 

I spent most of my adult life working with teenagers, including eleven years as a high school counselor.  Harassment and bullying were one consistent reality.  The level of pain kids could inflict on each other never ceased to amaze me.  I know some students were scarred for life because of the words and actions of their peers.  I was aware that such behavior took place in the adult world as well.  I encountered more that enough parents who were capable of using words and threats to gain the upper hand on behalf of their children.  Reality is; the fruit does not fall far from the tree.

Now, a new report from Pew Research has revealed that harassment and bullying among adults is an increasing problem in America.  I guess I could have expected such in a volatile political and social climate.  Unfortunately, social media has made it much too convenient for people to say angry and hurtful things about each other.  According to the report, roughly four-in-ten Americans (41%) have personally experience online harassment.  Name calling, physical threats and stalking were the most common forms of online harassment and bullying.

Young adults, ages 18-29, are most impacted by this rising trend.  Almost two-thirds (64%) of young adults reported that they had been harassed online, with almost half (48%) saying the harassment was “severe.”  Almost half (49%) of those ages 30-49 had experienced online harassment.  Even older adults over 65 have experienced online harassment, with one-in-five (21%) having faced it in some form.  As we might anticipate, women and ethnic minorities as more frequently the victims.

The Church, as the Body of Christ, is called to play a role in the chaos.  This is a major challenge since the church has an image problem from the perspective of many young adults.  The church is not viewed as a safe place to express an opinion or even ask for help.  It must begin on a personal level in the way we interact with and treat those around us, especially those who might not agree with us.  It also might require us to be a little less quick to speak and to measure our words when we do. 

Moving on to 2021

The past has everything to do with where we are today, but absolutely nothing to do with where we will be in the future.  I think the first time I made this statement was during a strategic planning session with the lay leadership at one of the churches where I served.  As I recall, the process had gotten bogged down because some of those involved were stuck in the past.  As a congregation, we wanted to move forward.  We wanted to make major changes in the way members were equipped for ministry.  It was not the fear of the future that was paralyzing them, it was more a reluctance to give up what had been successful in the past.

I fear the same thing might be happening as we move into the year 2021.  I can think of no time in my life when I anticipate greater change.  The pandemic has impacted every part of my life.  I have come to realize that when we finally do emerge from this health crisis, I will be living in a world that looks and feels vastly different.  It is a real challenge for an old man.  I cherish the memories of the world, especially within my church community, as I knew it.  I had expected change, but COVID-19 has hastened them in a way I had never imagined.

Let me focus on three changes I view as being most challenging for older adults, like myself to adjust to:

Hybrid worship is here to stay.  The pandemic forced us to change the way we worship.  Most of us viewed it as a temporary inconvenience.  That is borne out in the large number of older Christians who have expressed their desire to get back to in-person worship ASAP.  The reality is that many young Christians like the option of worshipping at their convenience.  While they long for the fellowship and sense of community, they also like the idea of being able to participate in worship online. 

Ministry will happen outside the walls of the church.  Most of us are accustomed to being at church.  We not only went there for worship and Bible study, but found much of our fellowship there.  In the post-pandemic world, more ministry will happen away from the church building.  Not only will more church meetings take place via Zoom, but so will Bible studies and other discipling activities.  Those under the age of forty are accustomed to functioning this way and now expect the church to adapt to their lifestyle.

Fellowship will look different.  At least for the foreseeable future, masks are going to be a reality.  Experts tell us that even with a vaccine, we need to maintain caution to avoid spreading the virus.  That really changes the way we relate to each other.  Close contact, especially hugs, are not going to happen.  We are used to fellowship time between services but that is going to be different.  Many are also going to be reluctant to attend fellowship meals.  The church kitchen might be one of the least used areas of the building. 

The one thing that does remain constant is God’s grace and His love for us.  We need to be mindful of that.  While the church as we once knew it might cease to exist, God is faithful and He has some awesome things in store for us.