Teen Sexting

With the beginning of a new school year the issue of sexting and the posting of suggestive photos on the internet is back in the news. Two local DFW school districts have specifically band texting and the general use of cell phones during the school day. Administrators for other districts have expressed concern over the material posted on student's web pages. During my years as a school counselor I regularly had to deal with this issue. Sometimes it was a parent who brought it to my attention. Other times it was one of my colleagues, some of whom out of a sincere concern for kids monitored the internet social network. Rarely did kids "blow the whistle" on their peers.

Typically the incident unfolded this way. Any adult would walk into my office and place an envelope or file folder on my desk. "Have you seen this?" they would ask. A glance at the material helped me to understand their concern. Ninety percent of the time it was a female student in some kind of a suggestive pose. My mental response was usually, "what were they thinking." My next step was always to contact the parent of the student and request that they stop by. I knew better than to approach the topic without them viewing the evidence. "My "sweet" daughter would never do anything like that." With the actual photo in front of them it was difficult for them to dispute the issue. At that point I would usually hand the evidence over to them and let them deal with it. I knew I wasn't done with it, however. In the ensuing days I would usually get the cold shoulder from the teen. Only on rare occasions did they really express what they were thinking, "You've got no right to control what I do in private."

We do have a responsibility to protect kids. Oft times the enemy is themselves. Truth is, they just don't think things through. The tempting photos they post for their friends to see sends a message to the opposite sex. Unfortunately that audience could include some perverted adults. Teenagers are vulnerable enough without increasing it by posting suggestive pictures of themselves.

As a parent, you are responsible for monitoring you teenagers internet and cell phone activity. That can be done by regularly asking them to show you what's there. Is it a violation of their privacy? Yes, but you are the parent and adult. In most cases you are paying the bills or have bought the computer they are using. Ultimately, it is your responsibility. If they object, take away the privilege or cancel the service. The reality is our kids are at risk.