An article on the front page of Sunday's Dallas Morning News caught my eye. The piece was titled,"Battling Underage Drinking gets an Older Look." A follow-up article on Monday also dealt with the issue of parents, and other adults, facilitating or ignoring teen drinking. Alcohol, much more so than drugs, was an issue during my years as a high school counselor. The athletic department had an in-season zero tolerance policy. Out of season it meant a four game suspension, minimum, even if you were just in the presence of. We also intervened when we became aware of incidents involving other members of the student body. As a private school we probably had more leverage and parental support than do public institutions. Many parents also signed a pledge that there would be no alcohol present if they hosted teens in their home. Those safe home were duly noted in the school directory.
As I have shared in the past, I made some poor choices during my high school years. I wasn't a bad kid, just one who let my peers make decisions for me. The one thing I did not do during those years was consume alcohol. There was a reason. My parents would have known almost immediately. At least one of them was up to greet me when I came home. It's hard to slip by mom and dad when you are tipsy, or even smell of alcohol.
Just an observation, but I suspect many parents are not as present in their kids lives today. I am sure there are still some families where the parents leave on the light for their kids, and even wait for them to walk in. But I am afraid there are too many more parents who are too caught up in their own self-absorbed lifestyle to even care about what their kids are doing and who they are with.
My parents had three rules. We need to know where you are. We need to know who you are with. We need to know what you are doing. They also required me to check in via phone. That was no easy task in the days before cell phones. Those are still great rules.
It doesn't hurt to wait up for them occasionally too. Even if you come in after them, check on them. You can usually tell when you open the door to a room where someone is resting, if that person is sleeping off a drunk.
Unfortunately we live in a society where we can't depend on other adults to watch out for our kids. That is still formost our responsibility.
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