Who Is Texting Your Kids at School?

I don't usually read the articles in those magazine the airlines place in the seat back pocket. I will admit to doing the sudoku puzzles found in the back, usually as a way to pass the time during take-off and landing. We were returning from my mother's birthday in Detroit yesterday when an article in the May Southwest Airlines magazine perked my interest. "66% of Parents Text Kids at School" the heading announced.

My experience in a school setting reminds me that cell phones have been an issue in schools. Five years ago the problem was phones that went off during class. Our school had a zero tolerance policy and students were required to keep their phone in the off position and out of sight during the school day. At the close of school every Friday there would be a line of students in the office waiting to retrieve their confiscated phones. That could only happen once. A second offense meant the principal kept their phone until the end of the semester.

How times have changed! Kids don't talk on their phones anymore, they text. If you've observed any group of teens you know what I am talking about. Texting is the kids way kids stay in touch, but it's not limited to communicating with peers. According to the article, 66% of students admit that their parents have sent them texts while they were in class. Most often the purpose of the text is to communicate logistics, "Will pick you up at 3:30 PM," but often it's to inquire about a personal issue, "Is he still bullying you?" or "Did the teacher like your report?"

No matter what the issue, texting a student during the school day is sending the wrong message. 75% or more of students admit that use of a cell phone during the school day is wrong. Still, a majority of them do it. That means they consciously break the rules. Now we find out that parents are encouraging this negative behavior.

What we need are more personal boundaries. Discuss with your student the cell phone rules that are in effect at their school. Then talk about their responsibility to follow those rules, in spite of what their peers are doing. Tell them if you need to text them, you will confine it to the last half hour of the school day. Subsequently, they need to check their phones after school for any messages. It might be helpful to establish other ground rules as well. No texting during meals or during other family time.

Texting is a wonderful tool. As a family we used it to communicate updates on our travel this weekend. As adults we do have the responsibilty to set good examples when it comes to cell phone use. I thought about this as we prepared to land in Dallas yesterday. The command was made to "turn off all electronic devices." Over a minute passed and I noticed a woman across the aisle still texting on her cell phone. She continued to use her phone throughout the landing. From her age and the ring on her finger, I would guess that she was a parent herself. And then we wonder where the negative behavior comes from.