You Can't Hurry Love

It was quite a weekend for our family. On Saturday we helped our daughter Katie move into a new apartment that she and her fiance, John, will share after they are married in September. We were planning on hosting all of the family on Memorial Day. That turned into a special celebration when our youngest son, Mark, called Sunday night to tell us that he and his girl friend, Kristen, were engaged. Two weddings are now on our agenda. We are excited for both Katie and Mark, and feel blessed that like our oldest son, Peter, they have found their soul mates.

To be honest, Barb and I often wondered whether either Katie or Mark would find a life partner. Both went through four years of college without having a serious dating relationship. Mark has been in full-time ministry here in Dallas for over six year. Katie got her masters degree before starting her full-time career. As a parent, it's easy to be concerned that your adult children will never find a mate.

We have learned some things in the process. They are principles I think every parent of a teenager, or young adult need to keep in mind.

You can't hurry love. It's easy to see that as a trivial statement, thanks to the Supremes and Phil Collins, but it's a fact. As much as we would like to program or plan our children's lives, we can't. Parent's should never play the role of matchmaker.

Remember, your role is to be a consultant and not a manager. It's ok to express your opinion, but you cannot run someone else's life. Even if your adult child enters into a relationship that you don't feel good about, it has to be their decision. And don't ever say, "I told you so."

Prayer is vital. We are in constant prayer for all of our children and grandchildren. One of my petitons has been that Katie and Mark would find God-fearing mates. I was persistent in that request. I was also confident that in His own time, God would answer that prayer. Once again God has proven his goodness.