Cheerleading Suit: Keeping Things in Perspective

We can all breath a little easier. The long-standing suit filed by a cheerleader and her mom against the Carrollton-Farmers Branch, Texas Independent School District is finally dead. A judge from the Fifth U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals basically threw out the case two weeks ago. In doing so he labelled the suit, "nothing more than a dispute by a disgruntled cheerleader mom over whether her daughter should have made the squad." The case dates back to April, 2008. Think of the court cost and legal fees accumulated over that time.

I am not saying that a girl's feelings were not hurt, or that her self esteem didn't take a blow when she didn't make the squad. Was she treated fairly? I don't know, but I do know that life is not fair. The best team does not always win. The most qualified individual does not always get the job. That's life.

I recall an incident when our son, Mark, was in middle school. He was the only 8th grade boy cut from the middle school basketball team. My experience working with teenagers told me that was wrong. At that age all students need to be given the opportunity to participate. The primary reason: It's hard to judge long-term talent during the middle school years. The awkward middle school student could develop into a superb athlete. As a coach myself, I recall one student who was slow and awkward as a freshmen, but went on to make first team all district as a senior.

In this case, the school claimed they did not have the staff or facilities to field a B-Team. Mark and a half dozen 7th graders were the "odd men out."

I met with the school administrators and finally a compromise was reached. The school agreed to pay for a team in a local recreational league. A dad came forward to coach and I assisted him when I was available. Mark, by the way, did come back to play two more years of junior varsity basketball, but was cut again his junior year. He found his niche shortly after that when he was offered the position of announcer for the basketball teams. He discovered a whole new world. He went on to be the arena voice for both the volleyball team and women's basketball team at Valparaiso University.

It's easy to get emotionally involved when we feel our children have been treated unfairly. That does not give us the right to bully those in authority or threaten lawsuits to get our way. The best approach is to get all the information, and if needed communicate our concern to those in authority. After that, we just need to let things go. When our children face the disappointment of not getting a part in the school play, or they lose an election to a more popular student, view it as a way of preparing them for the rest of life's disappointments. Believe me, there will be plenty of those. Remember, life is not always fair, but God has a way of using all of life's experiences to mold us into what he wants us to be.