THE BLAME GAME

Two Texas high school football players are at the center of a major controversy.  By now, you have probably seen the video of the two players violently and intentionally knocking down a referee.  I have watched video numerous times and am still shocked.  What is even more shocking is their excuse.  The two players, cleaned up in suits and ties, appeared on Good Morning America.  They were penitent and express regret over their actions, but I really struggle with their comments.  They blamed their coach and stated that they were only following instructions.  Both players stated that they had heard the referee in question use racial slurs.  He told Hispanic players they, “needed to speak English.”  He also used the “N” Word in reference to one Black player.  Since their interview the coach has admitted to the action and has been fired by the school district.

I am still not buying into the boys' innocence.  My mother would never have bought it either.  Growing up I remember using the “he told me to do it” excuse.  Her response was usually something along the line of “If they told you to run across the freeway, would you do that too?”  The message is still clear: I need to be responsible for my behavior.  Blaming other people for my actions is a poor excuse.  If your boss or supervisor tells you to do something illegal, I doubt the authorities would buy your “He told me to” excuse.  No matter the circumstance, we have a moral, and God given, responsibility to the right thing. 

I do find some comfort in the player’s remorse, and even in their regret over what took place, but I think we are doing them and other teens a disservice when we allow them to use the “He told me to” excuse.  When mistakes are made, we need to take ownership.  Even as parents, we need to step back sometimes and swallow our pride; “I am sorry but I made a mistake.”  In doing some we are modeling good behavior and helping our teens and young adults to learn to take responsibility for their actions as well.